As I have been reading some of my other favorites Bloggers out there I had a few out of the box thought reactions to their posts and felt it good to share something not so deep for a change. So here are a few snippets of my aberrant after-thought perspectives on Marriage, Eternity, Babies, and the After Life:
On Marriage and Eternity:
If the definition of Eternal is no beginning and no end, thus, forever forward, but also forever back, then what does Eternal Marriage or Eternal Families really mean? Does it mean that our families have always been our families? My spouse has always been my spouse? That we have always existed together like a family cluster of grapes on the vine of eternity? When we got married here, was that just an earthly formality of a forever previous relationship we have always had together? Was the birth of our children really just an family reunion, rather than a first introduction?
On Getting Remarried and Eternity:
In the spirit of eternal existence and eternal marriage I can not for the life of me understand getting remarried if a spouse dies, more especially sealed to another spouse. Does our wife/husband somehow stop existing just because we can no longer see them? Does our marriage evaporate or get put on hold when death temporarily separates us? Are they not just on the other side of a very thin veil patiently waiting for us to join them? I see death like moving from one room in the house to another. We both still exist just living in different rooms. Would any of us feel justified getting remarried just because our spouse leaves the family room to temporarily be in the kitchen? Wouldn't that be absurd? Yet in reality that is what so many feel they need to do or are counseled to do.
Will it not be an awkward reunion if we remarry and then when we too pass over, leaving the arms of our backup spouse and suddenly be expected to spring back into the waiting arms of our first? Will we not by this time feel a bit emotionally estranged from our former love? Would we not feel like in someway or form that we have been unfaithful to our original spouse and marriage? How would we cope with the emotional whiplash hopping from one relationship to another and then suddenly be thrown back into the first? How would that conversation go, "Oh while you were away...". Then assuming you could be forgiven and a relationship salvaged, one must know that the dreadful day will eventually come when the second spouse will also pass over and then what? Yet another, even more awkward and inevitably uncomfortable reunion, like asking two different dates to the prom--it can't end well! Either the three of them will have to come together in some awkward unconsented polygamistic union or one, if not all three, will have their hearts broken and their marriage and anticipated eternity disassembled! The horrors!! What lack of foresight and faith in your partner and Eternal Marriage.
Now I am not judging, I'm sure every possible scenario and situation exists out there and decisions, happiness and circumstances may very well necessitate or validate getting remarried. To all of which, marriage is a thing of beauty and happiness and foreverness--and everyone deserves to receive this in abundance and should seek after this. But to those who already have it and are unfortunately or inconveniently, but temporarily, robbed of this joy in this life, I say again in the vast general picture of forever, I don't understand the need to immediately replace something that is still intact, but just unseen. You may not see your spouse, but they still exist and so does your marriage. When the sun sets we know it will rise again in the morning, so we wait patiently and anticipate it's return and sure enough it does.
Interestingly and at quite a contrast in theology there are those who live their life without the opportunity to marry for whatever reason and we council them to be patient and endure faithfully and all blessings and happiness of eternal marriage will eventually be theirs, why can't we say the same to those whose spouses prematurely die? Instead they are encouraged to immediately fill their bed with a new companion. Wouldn't it be more respectful and honorable to our marriage covenants and our spouses themselves if instead we could endure this trial quietly and faithfully, anxiously anticipating the glorious future reunion of our eternal spouses? Isn't that a more beautiful and valiant love story than the inevitable awkward hodgepodge of marital collisions that awaits those who just couldn't wait for eternity?!
On Babies in Bellies:
We often praise the majesty and beauty of pregnancy. The awesome wonder of creating life, but seriously if it wasn't for the fact that we all came to earth this way wouldn't this be stuff you'd expect from a SiFi horror film? Scenes from famous films pop into mind having a living creature swimming and moving about inside of you, like a parasitic worm or alien with sharp teeth ready to burst through your stomach at any given moment!
Also if the tables were turned and we in our matured conscience were now stuck inside of another human being (assuming we could fit) how gross would that be? To have our head cuddled up somewhere between a pancreas and a beating heart? Our constricted feet bouncing up and down all day on someone else's bladder? Our elbows continually jamming into ribs or the occasional kidney or spleen as we attempt to stretch or move? Or how about being completely surrounded by the nauseating gurgling, expanding and contracting intestines with their rhythmic gastric fluctuations and bowel movements? And then to be stuffed inside of a sack of corn syrup-like fluid, left in total darkness and silence, with a food spick-it jammed into your belly button and a tar-like plug stuffed up your back side!? Seriously, how could that ever be ok?
But since that's how we all came to earth, it's beautiful.
On Death and After Life:
My parents are really into genealogy. They often blog about their ancestors and include photos and stories about their lives and accomplishments. I wonder what the conversations are with those who have already past on, you know these same ancestors on the other side of the veil? Do they write blogs about their great-great....grandchildren who are alive today? Do those who most recently die share our stories with them so as for them to pine toward us? Will they know or anticipate us joining them when we die?
Also, do you think that those who have died are stuck in their time era or will we find Pre-magnum-man, Noah, Mozart, Abraham Lincoln, and Martin Luther King all sporting skinny jeans, flat brimmed hats, non-prescription glasses and Toms?
How cool must the entertainment be in Spirit Prison? Seriously, think about whose probably there? The music concerts, plays, movies and comedy shows must be off the hook! I might just sign up to do missionary work there just to get tickets to see their performances! On the other hand if the only option in Paradise are Tabernacle Choir revivals I may kill myself if I wasn't already dead.
I think it is fine to remarry for time, just not eternity--not that that is even an option for me since I am female, but that is another blog post topic, isn't it? I loved being pregnant although child birth was an out of body experience, wherein I pretended that it was not my body in such a hideous position with a spotlight bearing down on me as well as a room full of people. Honestly, I feel not much connection to those who have passed on because I am so busy dealing with the living people I am in charge of raising. And yes, spirit prison does sound way more entertaining. Maybe I'll have to sneak a peak should I not already be there.
ReplyDeleteYour post reminded me of the logic I was trying to figure out in regards to our appearance and our genetic/DNA makeup and predispositions, etc. - because if we look like what we have always looked like because that is who we are then that means all relationships had to be that way before we were born - so all of the one night stands that resulted in children and families where each child is from a different father or any other situation - even those where the parents are the father and daughter or brother and sister, etc. all had to be arranged beforehand and no meeting or relationship is ever random. The other option is that we did not look like this before we were born and we were sort of nebulous before. Perhaps there was some sort of essence that was us, but without specific form.
ReplyDeleteAlso, on the topic of baby births- I said this exact same thing to mom when I was pregnant with one of my kids. I said that when I look through the baby magazines and it is all cutesy and cuddly and perfect I think it is just the opposite of reality which is nausea and vomit and the whole birth process is very much like ALIEN. I think mom was disturbed by my comment, but of course it is wonderful and miraculous and very cute when the baby is brought to you all cleaned up and wrapped in a blanket.
If you're looking at marriage from a sexual perspective, then marrying multiple people during your lifetime does create an awkward situation for the eternities. But if you look at marriage as companionship, a partner to journey life and the eternities with then it doesn't seem so unrealistic that mini groups of people made commitments to journey together, not just couples. It also seems realistic that families made similar commitments, and that the birth of your children is a reunion of souls, not an introduction. Also consider adopted children, foster children, and step-children. Surely these individuals aren't just randomly put in our lives either. And what about our non-biological families that we are just as bonded to (sometimes even more so) then to the families that share our DNA. The commitments we made may not just be about companionship and journeying together, we likely made commitments to teach each other, support each other, and comfort each other.
ReplyDeleteI have had times when I've met someone and there was an instant connection and the thought has come to me, I knew you before. I think we have lots of ties with our pre-existence and our post-existence. I liked the theory of life that it is not linear but spiral and we pass close by those time periods in the past and in the future and sometimes we actually make connections. Isn't it marvelous to know that we are not alone that the veil is thin on both sides and we are eternal.
DeleteI love your insights. Loneliness is the one word I hear repeatedly from those who are divorced, single, or widowed. Individuals find different ways to fill that void and for some it is to marry another companion. I think of my parent's friends who's husband died (after they were in their 70's) she remarried a man who's wife had died a few years earlier. They cherish their families and first spouse and yet are enjoying their senior years with a companion, not sealed together for eternity but for this life. It makes sense though nothing I'd plan to do.
ReplyDeleteI am excited to meet my ancestors that I've learned to love by studying about their lives and making connections with them. I believe they know us and in fact we are genetically a part of them.
Babies - I remember my dad in his later years commented a couple of times how miraculous and marvelous this body is, a perfect creation of intricacy and exactness. I thought he was thinking of it like an engineer fitting all the pieces together but as I too have gotten older and have been working in the health care field I find the wonder and amazement of the whole process of creation of our bodies as miraculous. To see the healing process, to study how each system in our body impacts others and how they work together to compensate and correct problems is amazing. True, our bodies are not perfect because mortality isn't perfect but what is glorious is that it will in the end be made perfect through the Lord, Jesus Christ. And just as we were created uniquely and individually so will be our perfected selves. No carbon copies. It's wonderful and I love it.
My last comment is on life after this - in my opinion paradise is going to be what we create it to be from what we've brought with us from this life. We will create it to fit us. I remember a movie with Robin Williams in What Dreams May Come where whatever he thought paradise should be it was and it matched a picture that his wife had painted from their memories together. I have a hard time thinking we'll just be angels sitting on clouds strumming away on a harp. Instead I imagine us being busy sharing the Gospel, helping with family history and having lots of family reunions, looking out for and inspiring our children, grandchildren who are still on earth and learning and exploring our new adventure. We are taught that we are to create our heaven on earth - those who create addictions in themselves will take that with them and their paradise will be "hell" because they can't satisfy their cravings while those that create joy, beauty, love, peace and happiness (no matter their circumstances) will take that with them and will have those qualities in paradise. Thanks for your thoughts for it cause us to think too.