Life is an Ascent

I just finished the best book.  It is called “The God Who Weeps”, by Terryl & Fiona Givens (a book commissioned by Sheri Dew, president of Deseret book).  It talks about the nature of Heavenly Father and the inherent risks of being our God, His vulnerabilities having set His heart upon us his children and His limitations to being overly involved in our lives due to His respect for our agency.  I find it interesting that we are here on earth scrambling to get to heaven, but do we really know what life there entails?  It is quite illuminating to consider the ramifications of the life so many of us are seeking to obtain--A life filled with immense happiness and joys, but also a life coupled with tremendous sorrows and limitations.  Welcome to the dichotomy of eternal parenthood!

Besides the exploration of life as a Deity, the book provides several insights and new ways of thinking on various gospel topics, each of which would make for a fantastic discussion or blog post.  Below is my own extrapolation and summation of some of these points coupled with a few quotes from the book that I found particularly relevant:

1. Life is an Ascent:  We mistakenly refer to our presence here on earth as a 'Fall' from heaven, due to the ‘Fall’ of Adam and Eve as if coming here to this lone and dreary world was a less desirable thing than staying in heaven in our previous state or as if there was another less messy way we could have progressed to perfection.  Why then did we leave the celestial splendor of heaven to 'fall' down to this planet filled with tears, suffering and heartache?  The scriptures clearly state that Adam [and Eve] fell that men [and women] might be; and men [and women] are, that they might have joy (2 Nephi 2:25).  We are here so that we can have joy, both in this life and more abundantly in the life hereafter--a fulness of Joy, the same measure of happiness that our Heavenly parents enjoy.  Therefore, if it was necessary to 'fall to earth' to have joy, what does that tell us about the level of joy we enjoyed before this world?  This means--We all gained something by leaving paradise.  This life is a precursor to something even greater.  We learn then that the 'Fall' of Adam and Eve was not a Fall at all, but rather an 'Ascent' toward something better.
2. We are and become what we desire to be:  “Our consequences are chosen by us at the time our actions are freely committed.  When we choose to indulge in a desire we choose it's fruit--bitter or sweet.  We become what we love and what we desire”.  Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "That which dominates our imaginations and our thoughts will determine our lives, and our character….What we are worshipping we are becoming".  Our actions determine and define who we are.  “Our choices turn our souls into our decisions”.  Membership, attendance, declarations alone do not qualify us for heaven, they only provide us the opportunity to become the identity they presume to offer.  “Our identity is the natural culmination of our true 'desires' expressed through a lifetime of choices”.  Our ultimate and culminating identity is what actually determines our eternal destiny. 
3. This life is NOT a test:  This life is an opportunity to ascend, to progress and develop further.  “We are not in a contest racking up points”.  This life is designed for “spiritual formation, not spiritual evaluation”.  We are here to improve on what we were before this life.  We are here to discover who we truly are and what we truly want to become.  We are part of an upward process of advancement.  We are not here to earn a place in heaven, we are here to become someone who wants to be and belongs in heaven (becoming heavenly ourselves).
4. The primary purpose of this mortal life is to experience mortal life:  If the primary purpose of this life is to become a member of His true church, than God has miserably failed the vast majority of His children.  Only 0.21% of the world are LDS (Mormon).  The sad truth is that this meager number probably represents the greatest assembly of 'Saints' the world has ever known, yet billions and billions have lived and died throughout this earth's history without hearing even a whisper of the name Jesus Christ or his gospel. Is God that blatantly inefficient or is God's purpose for His children in this life more than just discovering the gospel creme at the top of His religious truths?  The lessons of this life are vast and all-encompassing. Regardless of our religious beliefs, every person is exposed to the intricate complexities of a mortal life.  Each discovers through their own and shared experiences the inherent consequences of actions--some produce happiness and joy, where others produce sorrow and pain.  After Adam and Eve ate of the 'forbidden fruit', the scriptures reveal God saying, “Behold, the man is become as one of us to know good and evil” (Moses 4:28).  And thus each of us having been exposed to and having experienced both good and evil in our lives are better able to choose for ourselves what we ultimately desire (see 2 Nephi 2:27).  This costly education in the school of eternal development exists with or without the gospel in our lives.  Each life born into this world regardless of when or where, gains immense insights into the true nature of their soul, the inner desires of their heart and a glimpse at the prospect of what happiness is or could be.  For this reason, God seems to feel that a life spent without the blessings of the gospel is still a life well worth living.  [Note: To be sure, those so blessed throughout history to enjoy the added truth and knowledge of the gospel and been able to secure gospel covenants, blessings and promises will have had so much clearer the vision and potential to progress, although so also comes with it a greater obligation and responsibility.  While many of these lucky ones have spiritually excelled in their lifetimes, I believe that the 'vast majority of Saints live well below their privilege' (Elder Boyd K. Packer)].
5. It is not the sin that elicits the tears of God, but the results of sin to our souls: "The prophet Enoch is taken into heaven and records his ensuing vision. He sees Satan's dominion over the earth, and God's unanticipated response to a world veiled in darkness: 'The God of heaven looked upon the residue of the people, and He wept; and Enoch bore record of it, saying: How is it that the heavens weep, and shed forth their tears as the rain upon the mountains? How is it that thous canst weep?'  Clearly, Enoch, did not expect God to be moved to the point of distress by the sins of His children.  He then again asks, 'How is it thous canst weep?'. The answer, it turns out, is that God is not exempt from emotional pain.  God's pain, in fact, is as infinite as His love.  He weeps because He feels compassion.  The Lord then explains to Enoch, 'unto they brethren have I said, and also given commandment, that they should love one another, and that they should choose me, their Father; but behold, they are without affection, and they hate their own blood...and misery shall be their doom and the whole heavens shall weep over them, even all the workmanship of mine hands; wherefore should not the heavens weep, seeing these shall suffer?' (Moses 7:29-37).  It is not their wickedness, but their 'misery', not their disobedience, but their 'suffering', that elicits the God of Heaven's tears".  I believe in life we often lose this critical perspective--it is the result of sin, and what that decision makes of us that should be our focus, not the sin itself.  As before stated, "Our choices turn our souls into our decisions”.  It's not the coffee, pornography, lying or stealing itself that is the offense to God, it is the conscious inward results of that decision.  If we mistakenly focus on the 'sin' itself we will miss the true underlining spiritual pathology that is prodding the offender to seek after and eventually finding misery, captivity and death.  And it is these ultimate and unavoidable consequences that brings down the tears of heaven.
6. Sin is it's own punishment:  Obeying commandments naturally leads to happiness and sin naturally leads to misery and pain. "Sin is disharmony.  It is falling out of alignment with the pre-mortal state of our spirit and with God." Sin is separation from God by rebelling against the nature of God and therefore the nature of true happiness.  Alma explained that when we sin we are choosing to exist in a condition "contrary to the nature of God" and "contrary to the nature of that righteousness" which is the root of God's identity and the source of His perfect Joy (Alma 41:11)".  "God's supreme happiness is not an arbitrary category of the divine nature; it is inseparable from the perfection of those attributes that He chooses to manifest through His actions--actions that He invites and empowers us to emulate"   We choose who we are and who we are determines our happiness.  If we want to enjoy God's happiness we must make the decisions that God makes.  If we make the choices that Satan makes, we must likewise experience the misery of our actions as he suffers his.
7. Heaven is not a club we enter:  “Heaven is a state we obtain, in accordance with our ‘capacity to receive’ a blessed and sanctified nature”.  Living in the celestial kingdom requires that we are first celestial people.  “Heaven is a condition and a sanctified nature toward which all godly striving tends; it is not a place to be found by walking through the right door with [the right] heavenly hall pass”.  “We acquire heaven with our growing capacity to receive heaven”.
8. Erroneous theory of Spontaneous Spiritual Metamorphosis: Too many 'Saints' assume that just because they are members of 'God's true church' that they will inherently metamorphose into what God is.  As if by some inexplicable miracle, with little to no effort of their own, their nature will suddenly change and they will be transformed (or their spouses) into celestial beings!  They lump this in with the 'it will all work out in the millennium' catch-all comment.  The truth is, we build Heaven or Hell “for ourselves one brick and one choice at a time”.  

Although I have interjected a lot of my own words and thoughts here, I hope I haven't gotten too far away from the author's intended message.  With well over a hundred pages, the authors obviously are able to lay it out much more brilliantly than my feeble attempt here, therefore I would strongly recommend reading from the source.  Terryl Givens is one of my favorite authors and speakers.  Below is a link to the book for anyone who may be interested:

The God Who Weeps

Some things just taste good to the soul.

The Sweetness of the Lamb

A few weeks ago our Stake Patriarch and one of the sweetest and most honorable men in our ward passed away.  His name was Vince Hess.  He was survived by his brother, Jay Hess and his sister Joyce Hess Lambson, who live in homes on either side of Vince's and were thus all in my ward.  Last Sunday, a few days after the funeral, was our ward's fast and testimony meeting.  Joyce, who has long suffered from a speech impediment, stood up and bore her testimony.  She stuttered and struggled throughout, sharing her gratitude and heartfelt thanks for her brother and the generous well-wishers who had given her comfort in her recent loss.  She also expressed her testimony of God, Jesus and the truthfulness of the gospel.  Her testimony was all the sweeter because of the obvious struggles she bore in verbally expressing it to all of us her friends and neighbors.  

Regrettably, and to the banishment of the precious spirit that Sister Lambson had brought to the meeting, no sooner than did she sit down did an unknown man from an out of town ward boldly stand up and boasted that when he was young he too suffered from a speech impediment, but that through his fervent faith and prayers God in a miraculous spectacle from heaven had healed him from his infirmity, like lightening from heaven he was made whole.  From that moment on he never again suffered from that affliction, in fact, not only was he no longer burdened and weighed down by his physical malady, but in actuality excelled far beyond that of average men.  He then, ad nauseam and in excessive self-praising, gloated of his many accomplishments, publishing, TV infomercials, books, speeches that he was able to achieved due to his mighty faith and unfettered brilliance.  But this was not all, his eructation of his personal excellence continued as he recounted his unwavering faith and resilience as a child as he suffered through an atrocious tragedy.  To which he then provided a morbidly disturbing and graphically accurate rendition of the time he found the remains of his 'demon possessed' mother who had fatally shot herself in the head.  In his triumphant finale, he then professed to have later received, not only a surreal spiritual miracle, but to have received one by the literal hands of none other than the Three Nephites, who had seen fit and absolutely necessary to personally intervene in his behalf!

I can not say that his stories of miracles and manifestations were not true.  I can not say that God or even the Three Nephites did not intervene in his life.  Nor for that matter can I attest to his mental stability.  What I can say, however, is the spirit which humbly bore witness to the testimony of Sister Lambson had fled for cover on the arrogance and self-aggrandizing of this out-of-town brother.  The saddest consequence of this gentleman's boasting occurred a few hours later, as my wife Sandra later relayed to me, in Relief Society.  The lesson was on faith and the teacher in an attempt to repair the apparent, although inaccurate, spiritual implications resulting from this brother's rogue testimony addressed Sister Lambson and mentioned how she admired her enduring and courageous faith carrying this lifelong physical burden.  To which she replied, "I always thought that if I had enough faith, that I too would be healed like that man we heard from today".  Everyone's hearts just ached at her obvious lifelong pain and longing for physical mercy.  Yet, the question remained, 'Why would an all merciful and all knowing God bless this arrogant, self-inflated out-of-towner who claimed meritorious rite and not the sweet and humble local one?  Unfortunately, the meeting was pressed for time and came to an unresolved close.

Upon hearing this heart wrenching and I believe all too common experience, where a honest and humble person who seeks for relief, answers or blessings are left inexplicably denied.  The natural response, similar to that of Sister Lambson's, is all to often an inaccurate inference of being 'spiritually lacking' or 'unworthy'.  'Somehow and for some reason', the thought process continues, 'God doesn't hear my prayers or my pleading, He doesn't concern himself over my pain or my suffering' or that 'I am for some unknown cause out of reach for God's mercy or intercession'.  There are so many among us who suffer in silence.  They are surrounded, at least in belief, by the resounding answers and blessings that a merciful God has poured out upon everyone but themselves.

My mind is taken by two scriptural accounts, that I think is applicable here.  The first is the account of Thomas, one of the original twelve apostles who missed the appearance of the resurrected Jesus Christ and refused to believe unless he too could see:

John 20: 24-29

 24 ¶But Thomas, one of the twelve, called Didymus, was not with them when Jesus came.

 25 The other disciples therefore said unto him, We have seen the Lord. But he said unto them, Except I shall see in his hands the print of the nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will not believe.

 26 ¶And after eight days again his disciples were within, and Thomas with them: then came Jesus, the doors being shut, and stood in the midst, and said, Peace be unto you.

 27 Then saith he to Thomas, Reach hither thy finger, and behold my hands; and reach hither thy hand, and thrust it into my side: and be not faithless, but believing.

 28 And Thomas answered and said unto him, My Lord and my God.

 29 Jesus saith unto him, Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.

The second account is a delineation of the various Gifts of the Spirit that are poured out individually, with a foreknowledge of God, to each of His children.  To some is given one and to some is given another.  Each enriching and expanding the tapestry of faith for all to benefit and be enriched. 

D&C 46:

 10 And again, verily I say unto you, I would that ye should always remember, and always retain in your minds what those gifts are, that are given unto the church.

 11 For all have not every gift given unto them; for there are many gifts, and to every man is given a gift by the Spirit of God.

 12 To some is given one, and to some is given another, that all may be profited thereby.

 13 To some it is given by the Holy Ghost to know that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, and that he was crucified for the sins of the world.

 14 To others it is given to believe on their words, that they also might have eternal life if they continue faithful.

 15 And again, to some it is given by the Holy Ghost to know the differences of administration, as it will be pleasing unto the same Lord, according as the Lord will, suiting his mercies according to the conditions of the children of men.

 16 And again, it is given by the Holy Ghost to some to know the diversities of operations, whether they be of God, that the manifestations of the aSpirit may be given to every man to profit withal.

 17 And again, verily I say unto you, to some is given, by the Spirit of God, the word of wisdom.

 18 To another is given the word of knowledge, that all may be taught to be wise and to have knowledge.

 19 And again, to some it is given to have faith to be healed;

 20 And to others it is given to have faith to heal.

 21 And again, to some is given the working of miracles;

 22 And to others it is given to prophesy;

 23 And to others the discerning of spirits.

 24 And again, it is given to some to speak with tongues;

 25 And to another is given the interpretation of tongues.

 26 And all these gifts come from God, for the benefit of the children of God.

 32 And ye must give thanks unto God in the Spirit for whatsoever blessing ye are blessed with.

What I take away from these two accounts, is that each of us in this life are asked to walk our own unique path of faith.  To some are given fantastic spiritual witnesses of truth, to others are given unreel spiritual experiences and miracles, to others still are given exceptional faith, wisdom, or knowledge.  The absence of a desired gift doesn't mean the absence of their reality or the minimization of one's own gift possessed.  One of the least mentioned and acknowledged gifts of the spirit is the gift to believe on the testimony of others.  That is to say, to not receive your own answer, your own blessing, your own miracle in your behalf, or even receive any personal tangible witness of any kind.  It means to simply and humbly just believe.  A belief based purely on hope.  It is a powerful, albeit enigmatic gift of faith.  It requires the possessor to walk forward in darkness, but with a perfect brightness of hope that at the other end they will finally find their anticipated transcendent reward.  Others, lack this type of faith, like Thomas, they must 'see' to believe.  They not only dare not to walk forward in darkness, they can not walk in darkness.  They must have the way illuminated, marked and highlighted in order to proceed.  Contradictorily, the world praises the 'Thomases' who are given great and fantastic experiences, whose grandeur seem to cast ever widening shadows over those who quietly struggle without spiritual manifestations or assurances.  Misunderstood are these things of the spirit, but compassionately understood by Christ, He again declares, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.  The out of town brother who boasted of his many spiritual manifestations and feats was not lifting or strengthening the testimonies of others, but unknowingly declaring to us all of his insecurity and weakness of faith that he like Thomas needed to see these physical displays of proof in order to believe.

For all those who walk in the dark faithfully with nothing but hope to light your course, I praise your faith, I acknowledge your sacrifices and unheralded endurance.  The day will come, that every question will be answered, every gift given, every blessing received, and every trial lifted.  How great and marvelous will be your moment when the curtains are lifted and you are seen by all as you are seen by God.

The Gay Dilemma

Disclaimer: I know that same-sex-attraction is a hot political and religious topic and one that is becoming increasingly so.  With diametrically opposed movements building support and momentum on either side the war cry is sounded, 'which side of history will you be on'?  This is not the intent nor conclusion of this post.  I am not writing today with the intent to prove either side right or wrong as pertaining to same-sex-attraction or their desire for equal marriage rights.  This post, however, is a meager attempt to elaborate a perplexity of mine as to the seemingly disproportionate amount of emphasis and blame which is focused on those who are gay as to the perceived denigration of marriage and rampant immorality of society (as opposed to those who are not gay, but whose actions, I believe, actually cause far more reaching social and moral harm).



Over the past several decades, the gay rights movement has moved from the hidden outskirts of acceptable society to the center of American politics. I believe the real momentum that sparked it's evolution occurred fifteen years ago when Ellen DeGeneres publicly came out in 1997.  She subsequently used her hit show 'Ellen' to further propogate gay-right issues and it's acceptance.  While her show soon tanked and was cancelled, the seed was planted and a media metamorphisis was initiated.  I remember at first, television shows displayed large warning signs that 'inappropriate and possible offensive adult material' was included in it's episode, but as society acclimated they stopped displaying warnings.  Eventually they introduced the first gay kiss on TV.  The conservative mainstream went berserk and protests were held with fists in the air and anti-gay signs and slogans were everywhere.  Soon the fervor dissipated and homosexuals in our living room became common place as one show after another introduced gay characters into their popular television series.  Today there is hardly a show on TV that doesn't have some connection to a gay character or couple.  The media paints an alluring picture of acceptance.  They endear us with charming characters with witty lines and compassionate hearts free from social and moral consequences.  This pervasive movement into our lives through social media has changed our social perception and acceptance of gay individuals.  Just a few weeks ago, the President of the United States publicly declared that he is supports gay marriage and that our nation should be more accepting of the gay lifestyle, which would have been unheard of just years before.

In consequence to this social evolution, we have been hearing a lot of hype and media chatter about the 'War on Marriage' or more specifically the 'War on Traditional Marriage'.  I understand the offense and threat of redefining the definition of marriage and it's moral implications as acceptable normalcy into our society, but in my opinion the real war on marriage has been raging for much longer and it's current poster-child, the inclusion of gay couples into marriage, is but a small diversion from the actual evil behind the fight.  I think the real war on marriage is found in the mass frequency and acceptance of premarital heterosexual immorality and flagrant extramarital ease in which spouses so easily break their sacred marriage covenants by embracing sexual interactions outside of their marriage whether through pornography, filthy literature, perversions, inappropriate relationships or actual physical infidelity (Adultery).  Never before in history are adulterers and fornicators more accepted than they are today.  It is as if immorality has become so common place that society cannot even imagine a life with standards and virtue.  Honor, faithfulness, sacrifice, delayed gratification and integrity can likewise be said to be lost in marriage expectations.  As I see it, the morals of our society at large can be compared to the continuous melting of a hot wax candle till there is nothing left but a lone moral wick standing in a puddle of molten promiscuous wax!  

With the horrendous onslaught of moral decrepitude in this world, what makes homosexuality a worse sin than all other sexual aberrations?  In my view there is nothing more evil, divisive and destructive than adultery.  Not only are they engaging in sexual acts outside of wedlock (which by Christian definition is morally reprehensible), but they are also breaking their marriage covenants, shattering their family and destroying the intimate trust of their loved ones.  This selfish act of unbridled lust can permanently devastate and fracture an entire family with unmeasureable harm.  Nothing that two gays can do to each other can ever result in the far reaching outbreak of chaos and pain that adultery can cause.  Yet, adulterers can live respectable lives in our society.  They are seldom persecuted or discriminated against.  In fact, in some situations they are even praised for their conquests!  On a similar note, fornication whether casually or as a result of a deepened relationship account for nearly 60% of all babies born (with 89% of those babies conceived by 15-19 year old girls)!!!  Where is the social outcry for all of this?  Yes, there is some, but nothing on the scale of the outcry about gay marriage in my opinion.  Certainly if families are falling apart because of the lack of faithfulness within their 'traditional' marriages and out-of-wedlock pregnancies are leading to more than half of all children being born, the result is a vast multitude of children left to grow up without the support and stability of a 'traditional family' and thus the world is forced to carry the inevitable weight of these social burdens and their ever increasing consequences!  Are these not tremendous casualties of war--the real war on marriage?  

So I am left to wonder why are the gays, those whose sexual actions account for the least amount of real harm or consequences to society, left taking the brunt of the moral burden?  Are the gays just a convenient scapegoat to distract the world from the real moral decay that pervades our society or are they simply the ominous yellow canary indicating how close we are as a society from becoming completely morally bankrupt?

The gays are asking for equal rights and social legitimacy.  Social conservatives respond citing further moral degradation.  I therefore ask, Will gay marriage somehow lessen the sacredness of traditional marriage?  Personally, I do not think so.  Let me clarify, either it may be seen as a continuation of the erosion of social morals that already make a mockery of the sanctity of marriage or it can be seen as I would see it:  That no other person's marriage or relationship effects who I am or what I have.  The success, sacredness and happiness of my relationship and marriage is not based on a comparison of others, nor is it based on another's perceptions and beliefs or lack thereof.  I have made covenants between my wife and God and no one else matters.    I see it similar to baptism.  The validity and sacredness of my baptism is not diminished because others of different faiths or beliefs also baptize.  Their beliefs and baptisms do not lessen my baptism, neither do other's marriages of whatever level of sacredness lessen my marriage.

Secondly, will the inclusion of gay marriage in society be the tipping point that will lead to rampant immoral promiscuity as so many conservatives fear?  Hard to say.  I feel that society has already plummeted off a proverbial moral cliff decades ago and has been accelerating towards Hell with ever increasing incident by heterosexual misconduct already, although I would imagine that any accelerant would increase it's breadth and pace.

There is a war on traditional marriage, but I do not feel it is all about the gays.  While I myself am not threatened by gay marriage and I feel great empathy for those who struggle with same-sex-attraction, I do feel that it's inevitable inclusion to normalcy in society is a manifestation of societies general descent of traditional values and morals.  This is the real glossed-over issue--the mainstream loss of morality.  As is often said, we are free to choose, but not to choose our consequences.  The world is on a slippery slope of immorality from so many fronts and it's consequences are at our door.

In an associated note:
The LDS church has created a wonderful pamphlet entitled,"God loveth his children" (2007) which eloquently elaborates the LDS church's position toward same-sex-attraction.  It is well written and expresses a greater understanding, sympathy and empathy for those who struggle with this than is often portrayed across the pulpit.  See link below:

http://www.lds.org/manual/god-loveth-his-children/god-loveth-his-children?lang=eng